15 Helpful Phrases For Saying "No!"

I was taught from a very early age to be a people pleaser. I think many of us are, however, it is not always a healthy thing for us to live our lives pleasing others. When taking care of ourselves we often have to or need to say, "No" but it can be difficult, especially when we are caught off guard.


There are always people that want something more from us. One "little thing" can blossom into more than we bargained for or that can be far more in-depth than we imagined when we gave that bright and positive "Yes!" 

Remember that for every single thing you say yes to, you need to say no to some other thing in your life. Do you really want to bake 15 dozen cookies for a bake sale or would you prefer to have a nice dinner with your family or play a board game or even just sit in a bubble bath with a glass of wine? Saying "yes" to yourself means saying "no" to others sometimes and vice-versa. Unless it is something you really love, want, or believe in, then saying "no" is more than ok; it is necessary.

It is important to practice being non-committal when we have been used to doing it all or doing for others before taking care of ourselves or putting our own priorities first. Saying "maybe" can be one way to give ourselves the time we need to ponder over the actual consequences of saying yes too soon. What exactly will you have to give up to say "yes"? What does saying "yes" entail, exactly? These are all things that should be taken into consideration before committing to anything that will take away from our very limited free time.

Here are some phrases to practice for when you are caught off guard or feel the need to reply to someone when they ask you to give you their time for some purpose.

• I wish I had an answer right now, but I don't. Can you check back with me later?
• Let me think about it and see if I can free up some time.
• I really would like to but I just cannot.
• I am really not the right person for that at all so I have to decline.
• I am sorry but that just will not work for me.
• No, I can't do that. What I can do is _____________________.
• Thank you for thinking of me. I wish I could but I have to say no.
• I am unable to commit myself to that currently.
• I wish I could but I am not available.
• I understand you need my help but I am just unable to make that commitment. I am sorry.
• I am over committed currently so I have to pass.
• If I were to say yes to you I am afraid I would let you down and I don't want to do that.
• It sounds wonderful, however, I am already booked.
• I need to say no to that right now but promise to let you know if that changes.
• Let me check my calendar and get back to you if I am able to commit to it.

Remember:

You do not owe anyone any other explanations. 

Just think of all the time you will have to say, "YES!" to what really matters! That alone should help you when practising these phrases and getting ready to use them when the moment arises.